Would you like to
swing on a star?
Carry moonbeams home in a jar?
And be better off than you are?
Or would you rather be a mule?
Carry moonbeams home in a jar?
And be better off than you are?
Or would you rather be a mule?
- Swinging on a Star by Johnny Burke
If God wanted us to be pack mules, we’d have four feet and a
tail to swat flies.
We don’t, of course. But I still felt a bit muleish during our test hike on that
recent Saturday. Not stubborn. Just burdened by a 25-pound load of miscellaneous stuff
strapped to my waist and shoulders as we hiked a portion of the North Country
Trail.
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| The sign that inspired. |
It had been 45 years since I’d donned a backpack. Not the
flimsy daypacks we all have in our closets. Or even the stouter packs – the
kind poor students must carry as they haul half a library’s holdings from class
to class.
I’ve worn both kinds, a number of times, since I was 15.
But this was a backpack in the traditional, but also contemporary, sense –
an Osprey Aether 70. A state-of-the-art model with removable hip belt, dual
density foam harness, spacer-mesh airflow that wicks away moisture on warm
days, and a break-away lumbar pack. Interior frame, of course.
It can haul 50 pounds … probably more … and do so, says the
company, in perfect comfort.
The pack’s product description makes the nerd inside me
blush.
“Suspension features a peripheral frame, a smooth,
spacer-mesh back panel, single stay and an internal framesheet.”
Yep, you bet.
“Compression system with 3 horizontal straps and 1 internal
strap lets you securely compress the contents whether full or nearly empty, and
without sag or load distortion.”
Oh yeah ... nice.
“Hydration-compatible design features reservoir sleeve and
dual drink tube exit ports for on-the-go hydration (reservoir sold
separately).”
Atta boy! Is there more?!
“The Osprey Aether 70 pack shaves weight yet remains tough
with a 210-denier double-ripstop nylon and 500-denier plain-weave oxford
nylon bottom.”
Oh my gracious me!!
My world for a plain-weave oxford nylon bottom.
Just $289.95, plus shipping.
“You know, Bill,” I yelled behind me as we walked, “I used
to marvel at my backpack on my long hikes in Boy Scouts. It would squeak, but the sound comforted me.”
![]() |
| My Aether 70 and Oboz boots. |
Bill, my hiking partner, chuckled. His pack was squeaking a
bit, like a metronome with a bird-like peep rather than the usually soft
tick-tock of shifting weight.
It was causing him consternation; he wondered if it
bothered me, too.
“I found comfort,” I continued in response, “because I knew
that everything I needed to survive and prosper on the trail was across my
shoulders.”
Profound, I thought. Existential even. What’s the
inconvenience of a small squeak when the tradeoff is total self-reliance?
Bill chuckled again. I'm sure he wanted to trade my
jibber-jabber for a can of WD-40.
Bill and I will soon be walking more than 160 miles along
the southern shores of Lake Superior. Ten days on the trail, planned for early
October. A few overnights in motels, but mostly camping on the trail and
relying on what we’re carrying.
The North Country Trail twists and turns its way across
seven states, from New York to North Dakota. Some of its prettiest stretches
are here in Michigan. It enters from Ohio near the town of Pittsford, at
Michigan’s southeast corner. It follows a zigzag path north, across the
Mackinaw Bridge, then along the northern edge of the Upper Peninsula.
It exits for Wisconsin near the community of Ironwood, at
Michigan’s farthest northwest corner.
The path snakes immediately southeast and east of Traverse
City, where I live. Which is what sparked my interest. Last year, Cindy and I
were walking the trails of the nearby Sand Lakes Quiet Area; the NCT crosses through
its middle. And there was a large, wooden sign at a key junction, with arrows pointing left and right:
NORTH COUNTRY TRAIL
“2400 mi.
NEW YORK/NORTH DAKOTA 2100 mi.”
And that’s when my imagination soared. It was such a
powerful thing to know that we could simply walk to the right and we’d
eventually land in North Dakota, or go left and stride into the Empire State.
And not by highway, of course. But by a wooded, sometimes
rugged, usually narrow trail that snakes through national and state forests,
along rivers and lakeshores, over mountains and across immense, flat prairies.
So, yes, the decision to turn right or left would have been
a simple one. But not simple in its consequences … more than 4,000 miles of
complex terrain to choose from.
We’ve all heard of the book Wild by Cheryl Strayed and the movie with Reese
Witherspoon that followed. Backpacking has surged because of it.
Cindy knows two folks here in Traverse City who are now hiking
the Pacific Crest Trail, the same, unforgiving path that Strayed used to cast
out her demons. We’re unsure how they’re doing week to week because it's hard to communicate out.
We also know of two guys from T.C. who vowed to walk the
entire NCT this spring, summer and fall. They started in snow-clad North Dakota
knowing they were on a race before heavy snows would fall later this year in
New York.
They gave up in Minnesota. The math had been easy. To
complete the entire trail, they would need to average 25 miles of walking per
day packing 50 pounds of supplies each. Over seven months.
The work was not. How much is 50 pounds? Go to Ask.com to
get an answer:
“Examples of
items that weigh 50 pounds: a small bale of hay or a border collie and house
cat combined; 5 medium-sized bowling balls; 5 house cats; two car tires and a
large bag of sugar; a microwave oven and two bags of flour; 10 average sized
table lamps and 10 Chihuahua dogs.”
So, a lot.
One of the guys was
interviewed on the local radio after his return.
“Why’d you stop?”
“Depression,” he
said, his voice flat.
“Would you do it
again?”
“Not sure … (pause)
… probably not.”
I can imagine why.
The endless pace, the five-bowling-ball loads. Clouds of mosquitoes as thick as
morning fog. Black flies that rip your skin and your soul. Freezing nights. Scorching days.
Not that what Bill
and I are planning even compares to their efforts, or that of Strayed. For starters, neither of us
is using the trail to cast out demons. Don’t think, so, anyway. And we’re
planning to conquer
just 167 miles, much of which is along a beautiful Great
Lake. So “conquer” seems overstated.
![]() |
| Witherspoon as Strayed. |
Sure, we might
encounter snow in early October. I’m betting, too, that we’ll swat at some
die-hard mosquitoes and black flies. And it’ll be bow-hunting season, so
there’s a risk of wayward arrows. Oh ... and bears also are on the move then, packing in pounds before hibernation.
But it won't be like Strayed's trek, or the T.C. pair's. Not close.
Sure, we'll need to feel comfortable with 30 or 35 pounds on our backs, not just 25.
Sure, we'll need to feel comfortable with 30 or 35 pounds on our backs, not just 25.
But Bill’s there
already. He walked with ease that day.
I’m not. Those 25 pounds felt mighty heavy on my hips. Just two and a half bowling balls.
Wimp.
So it’s not a bad
thing right now to want to feel muleish.
A stout mule can
carry, with ease, 200 pounds. I guarantee there will be times in October, when
the load seems heaviest and bugs the thickest, that I’ll yearn to be a mule ... to have four legs and a
tail that swats.
And why not?
Heck, you
can swing on a star anytime.
Next: My
marvelous, magical, new tent.




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